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‘No, honestly, guys, this one is different’ say authors of new Indigenous health study

The authors of a new study on health factors in Indigenous communities insist this one is different than the dozens of other reports published this year alone.

“‘No, honestly, guys, this one is different,” said lead author Gilbert Hanson, a professor at the University of Ottawa.

“Like I know the last 16 reports looked at socio-economic factors in relation to Indigenous health but this time we compared it to populations in Australia. So, yeah.”

Hanson said that the team behind the report carefully selected new graph styles with different colors and a type of font not seen in their earlier reports.

However, not everyone is pleased.

“You’d think they’d have figured out there’s issues in communities that need to be addressed and not studied,” said Lisa Greyeyes, who has been the subject of 23 studies in the past four years.

“At this point, I’m a walking, talking longitudinal survey.”

The report was conducted over the past two years at a cost of $176,000 which the authors insist couldn’t have possibly been spent directly in Indigenous communities.